Bear Blog Most Recent Posts

Não durmo direito, não como, não bebo

hidden (cartasenario) — Fri, 18 Sep 2026 21:52:03 +0000

Mando carta perfumada, fico na torcida pra você me responder.
Quero contar meus segredos e ganhar um beijo, um sorriso, um retrato, uma mão...
Não me canso de dizer o que sinto por você...
Você é tão maravilhosa... que Deus ilumine a estrela que és!!!
Olá, eu sou sua fã.

Fico na torcida para voce me responder... todo o tempo isto.
Caraças, la migajería.
Hay poco que diga no lo hago por hacer, lo hago por dejar huella.
Fico na torcida para voce me responder.
Mínimo movimiento y esperar una reacción. Más que eso me parecería absurdo y a lo mejor ahí está el problema. No quiero ser pesada, soy demasiado seca y por eso no tengo respuesta.
Creo que cualquier otra sería denunciarme a mí misma y ponerme en evidencia: siempre mi deporte menos favorito. El que más; hacer el ridículo.
Contradictorio, ¿no crees? Así es, incoherente hasta el final.
Poco me hace pensar que sea de 1 a 10 un 0 la cantidad de tiempo, comparativamente, que tu pienses en mí. La cantidad de abejas rondando me hace sentir tan poco interesante, otra señora aburrida no más. So mais uma amargada.
So mais uma fã.

Não durmo direito, não como, não bebo... só vivo de te ver passar.

4th person Pronouns

hidden (bigjake) — Fri, 18 Sep 2026 21:51:15 +0000

I love English, it's such a complicated language. So many different rules, and exceptions to the rules, and then exceptions to the exceptions to the rules. It's just so much fun. I've learned a couple of other languages like Spanish, and Korean, and while each is unique in their own way, nothing really beats the fluidity and creativity of English.

I watched a video online, and they proposed that the word "Chat" might be the worlds first ever usage of a 4th person pronoun. Kids in the newer generations use it all the time, imitating live stream influencers. My favorite is the expression, "Chat, is this even real?" in completely real world, not being recorded or streamed, language.

What a time to be alive to see how language and culture is being influenced! For me, I always love to see how things change. So many people are against it, and I don't understand. Why would we want our language or culture to stagnate? "That's not the way we did it back in my day", or "These young people don't know how to speak proper English". Who decides what's proper or not? It's certainly not English teachers, try as they might. Communication is about understanding, and as long as both parties understand what the other is saying, why does it matter the exact words used? When someone says, "Chat, is this even real", you don't have to know who chat is, but the intonation, situation, and parts you do know is enough to understand what's being said. Even when you use the same expression for different meanings, there is enough other context to understand.

I guess what I'm trying to say is, who would've ever thought we would ever need 4th person pronouns, yet here we are. I wonder what crazy thing people are going to come up with next?

Am I lucky or just a white man?

hidden (marcg) — Fri, 18 Sep 2026 21:50:00 +0000

This week has been a pretty variable one. It has gone from me living on the floor of my friend’s sublet, to somehow, within around 16 days start to finish, having found my own place to live, which in Berlin is a pretty notable achievement, especially one that resulted in me: not getting fucked over on cost, not having to deal with nightmare landlords, not having to travel halfway across the city or into the middle of nowhere to have somewhere to sleep, and it being an unlimited contract.

I started looking for places to live seriously after crashing at empty flats of friends of mine for the last few months and while the place I have now is until the end of October, I knew I needed to use this time wisely to find something as fast as possible, because this city can either take minutes or months to secure living arrangements (that aren’t horrendous economically or in a physical sense), so the sooner I started the better. I gave myself about two days of chilling after finding myself in this 95% spartan abode (which is why I am typing this from the floor with the laptop placed exactly where it’s name comes from) and then began my search.

Finding a place in Berlin is one of the most nightmarish things imaginable for most people. There are always horror stories of people searching across many platforms, employing every trick in the book be it bots to scrape websites and automatically send emails/messages to landlords, asking friends/colleagues/people in the street, “please sir/madam, can I have an apartment?”, and then just throwing up hands before running out of time and accepting the first place that says “yes", you can stay here… for a price”, which ends up costing them two-thousand euros for 50 square metres in the middle of Neukölln on Sonnenallee, just because as humans, we kind of need somewhere to sleep. It’s a shitshow here and getting worse every year.

Unless, you use this one easy trick… Be really, really white.

I am saying this to inflame a bit, I admit, but let me explain a bit more fully.

I come from Australia, where us whiteys grow up speaking English (in an almost intelligible manner), are given ample opportunity to study at an advanced level, are paid enough in our younger years to be able to travel around the world (no doubt you’ve encountered many a drunken Aussie on your adventures yourself, and you’ve probably noticed when there’s a bunch of us together, my former argument of intelligible English goes out the window), and on top of all that; we are generally seen by others as a likeable and agreeable folk. It’s a bit of a national/genetic lottery that was won and in times like these, it’s so clear the advantage that it gives us.

Back in 2021, my former partner and I were looking for a place to stay and I had been grinding Kleinanzeigen (like Craiglist/Gumtree here in Germany) for places to move to from our tiny crapshack for a few months, but never sending any requests for a visit, just keeping my ear to the ground in case something perfect (re: with a balcony) popped up. Then, one day at around 6:30am, I wake up, start checking, and there’s this place where the photos are nice, the price is very nice, the area is superb, and as I’m going through the carousel of images, I am a bit saddened by no balcony, until, at the very end: Boom. Sunny balcony.

I write them immediately and they write back almost as fast asking us to come visit today. Sure, we can do that, and to boot, we are only the third couple who had come that day. I had managed to get to the listing about 10-20 minutes after they had posted it, so speed is absolutely of the essence here if you’re searching, but even then, you will never be first (probably).

We get there, and immediately we hit it off with them. They’re a lovely couple who had been there for eight years and were ready to ditch Berlin and head to Spain, leaving all their furniture and just saying “hasta luego” and starting again. We had to agree to pay two-thousand euros to take over their furniture which was a very good deal for everything we got.

What was interesting was what they said about the other couples who were before us. They actually suggested that the woman of one of the couple’s was a mail-order bride and we, cringing a bit, said “oh that’s interesting" or something to that effect. The other couple I don’t remember, but they clearly didn’t like them, yet they did like us a lot. Now, I don’t want them to read this (if they ever do) and think that I’m suggesting they were anything but absolutely friendly and acting in the most empathetic manner, but us, two white young professionals with perfect English (they were German, but excited to speak English), were clearly the top pick of the day’s viewings.

So we hit it off, they say great, we say great, they tell us they’ll put in a good word with the Hausverwaltung and we sign away a small fortune for the furniture should the apartment come to us. And, of course, we get the apartment. This was I believe the first place I applied to.

So let’s fast forward to now. I have just signed the contract to take over a beautiful, very well-priced, very well-located, unlimited contract here in Berlin, three minutes from where I’m sitting at this very moment. I’m at the office on Wednesday and shoot off my 90th or so message in the Immobilienscout platform to a new place that popped up about a minute before which states that it’s a takeover of the existing contract and you need to be prepared to pay four-thousand euros for the built kitchen. Fuck’s sake, but wait a second, the kitchen looks decent? And he claims he paid almost eight-thousand for it in 2023? Fuck it, applied.

About a minute later my phone rings and it’s the guy. We rattle off in German a bit before, after getting a bit stuck, he asks if I want to speak English, to which I agree, but not before he compliments me on my German and then we swap (small flex, I know, but I was honoured). So he’s just had another person fall through, he needs to get the fuck out of there by the end of September, and if I can be there at 6pm, in 45 minutes, that would be great because there’s someone else coming at 6pm. Sure, I’ll see you there!

I get there ten minutes early because I think to myself, I’m gonna swoop this other dude who get’s there at six and get my foot in early. That pays off. I get upstairs, we chat, we’re hitting it off, and I’m getting major throwbacks to 2021. Now this dude is lovely, the place rocks, I’m stoked and ready to pay for the kitchen and say yes to everything, let’s go. He’s happy too, and what I catch is that the guy who’s coming at six has a name that is not a traditional white guy name from Australia/England, and that the woman coming tomorrow is from northern Africa. Now, in my head I’m immediately like, “well, this is to my advantage”, because it is.

That’s because I can turn up to a place, fumble their language and have it waved away without a problem 95% of the time, switch to my native language which is the world’s lingua franca, have the door opened to me and the person sees my skin colour and me with a big smile on my face and assumes I’m friendly (I am, but they assume it, too), so they also are back (which is self-reinforcing because I now assume I will be treated in a friendly manner, so lead essentially without being standoff-ish), and because of this I’ve been able to get a good job, earn well, which means I can agree to a very expensive kitchen at the drop of a hat and still have enough savings to eat more than oats. There’s not one way in which I don’t have an extreme advantage here. Hell, that’s just me scraping the surface of it, I’m sure.

Oh yeah right, I’m also a fucking man, so let’s not forget that, either.

The other guy eventually gets to the ringing the doorbell, so we wrap up our chat, I head for the door and shake the competition’s hand on the way out. As I’m heading down the stairs, I hear him struggling with German, but making an earnest attempt, and I feel fairly sure it’s over for him.

I’m outside decompressing a bit as all this schmoozing is sweaty work–as is agreeing to get rid of all your emergency fund essentially–and begin my ride home. I spot my competitor on the street, holding the document for the kitchen takeover agreement, and give him a thumbs up: “we’re gonna make it.” His holding of the document is when I know he’s out: you need to sign on the spot. And, why can I do that? Because of everything I mentioned that led to me having the liquidity to do that right now.

I end up chatting to the tenant and actually, he’s great. He’s giving another person a chance tomorrow, and does, and they thankfully decline to move forward, so I get the confirmation the next day and I’m in! Not after a borderline sleepless night, but I was too excited. I suspect they declined because of the kitchen cost too.

Chatting that day to a colleague, she highlights that it is so easy because, Marc, you’re a white man. She’s right, it is, and of course an hour later I get another offer for a very nice place next to Mauerpark. The white man strikes again.

I don’t want to throw all my luck into the racial/gender pile. I am fast, I am a good communicator, I have saved my emergency fund to be able to react to these moments with speed, I am not picky, I am punctual and polite, and I like to learn about people and hear what they have to say and what their problems are. This guy had a problem and I could help solve it, right now. But to look at all that and ignore the big white elephant in the room would be pretty ridiculous.

The tenant here (and the ones previously) are not at fault here in any way as far as I can see. They are just responding to their situations with what is front of them and society pushes me to the top pretty much absolutely. I think what I have previously in my life attributed to luck really is not that as much as I’d hoped, and it’s something that I feel the need to reflect on and notice more as it happens.

This city is tough for newcomers and oldheads alike, and I have many immigrant friends from non-English speaking backgrounds who struggle here often even when they speak perfect German. Hell, even when they’re naturalised Germans.

To all those on the hunt for a place to live: I hope you get your dream spot (or just something reasonable) soon. The second place I was offered is beautiful, but expensive and will keep increasing with rent as it’s used to prey on vulnerable people with nowhere else to go, so don’t worry, you didn’t miss out on a thing. You got this, keep at it, if I hear of anything I’ll send it out into the Universe so that it might float your way. Good luck.

I almost posted this in the morning before actually receiving the contract, but somehow my psyche knew that this would totally jeopardise all my chances of getting the final documents, and as such, I patiently waited until the document was in my hot little hand before this would go up. I waited all damn day and I felt my stress levels rising as each hour passed, until I caved and wrote the guy asking if today was the day or not. And then, of course, two minutes later the contract arrives.

For the Last Time I'm Not Downloading Your Stupid App

hidden (absurdpirate) — Fri, 18 Sep 2026 21:31:00 +0000

So, I've made it a point on this blog that I don't have any social media accounts. I occasionally use Reddit for some niche fix-it questions and to scroll r/corgis or r/trees when I'm bored as hell at work. However, the funniest thing happened... Reddit started getting a little ballsy. It's not blocking me from the using the app with the most audacious text, "Join the most real place on the internet!".

This is like those dudes that feel the need to remind everyone what a nice guy they are. If you have to tell everyone you're probably not. "mOsT rEaL pLaCe On ThE iNtErNeT!" Fuuuuck you. Reddit is basically liberal Xitter. Full of a bunch of blowhards and bots.

Not only did this ass-wipe of a social media bar me from using the desktop after a certain point, it also begs me to download their app. So you know what, now I'm just not using your dogshit site. Sit on a cactus and spin.

Facebook is the same way. I will occasionally browse marketplace and then this popup with all the couth of public flasher demanding I sign in or create an account so I can see if someone is selling their kid's old iPod. Cuckerberg can suck my ass like a milkshake if he thinks I'm going to create an account for his gods-forsaken platform.

This is honestly just an annoying factor with a lot of websites. It seems like they have a vested interest in just pissing you off. The main surface web is borderline unusable these days. You go on a site and some un-closeable popup will guilt trip you into turning off adblock to "support the site". You oblige and immediately get your eyes hate-fucked by 100 ads all opening and auto-playing at once. I would like to meet the people who do this shit on their sites so I may introduce their teeth to a curb.

Anyway, yeah. The corpoweb sucks. More at 11. Just wanted to rant.

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Reply via email: me@absurdpirate.com

as of writing this...

I've got the house mostly to myself today. Bought a light blue DSi like the one I had when I was a kid. Was a pretty good deal. I also see a bunch of people talking about this site called pxlarea.com and I guess someone made me a pixel (x 77: y 76), so thanks whoever that was. Anyway, probably gonna do piss-all with the rest of my day. Got to see Weezer a few days ago in concert, so that rocked. Played all my fav songs even some B-sides I didn't think I'd hear live like "I Just Threw Out the Love of My Dreams". I think I threw my neck out during Hashpipe, shit goes HARD live.

Letterboxd's List of the Top 250 Movies by Female Directors

hidden (theoutsideman) — Fri, 18 Sep 2026 21:30:00 +0000

It's pretty bad.

#1, CITY OF A GOD, is a movie that for most of its life was credited only to a male but now has been retconned to having a female co-director for purely political reasons. See also SLUMDOG MILLIONAIRE and the works of Bela Tarr.
For decades Catherine Breillat was considered one of the greatest female directors as well as a feminist icon. But since she dissented from #MeToo, she's be ostracized. Zero Breillat on the list but there are masterpieces like BUT I'M A CHEERLEADER and A LEAGUE OF THEIR OWN. Never seen a Breillat? Start with LAST SUMMER, BRIEF CROSSING, FAT GIRL, or ROMANCE.
Goes without saying there's no Riefenstahl.
THE MATRIX in the top 20.
I pimp Zhao's THE RIDER whenever I can, like I did in my previous post, and it's on the list so that's cool, but below HAMNET which is dreadful.
Sofia Coppola one of the best directors working today of either sex but she only has one movie on the list, THE VIRGIN SUICIDES, at #178, behind such masterpieces as MAMMA MIA! and SPIRIT: STALLION OF THE CIMARRON.
WOMEN TALKING made the list. To be fair, I've never seen it and I doubt I ever will with a title like WOMEN TALKING.
Movies on this list that I've enjoyed out of the 40 I've seen: CLEO FROM 5 to 7, PAST LIVES, VAGABOND, DAISIES, THE HEARTBREAK KID, Gillian Armstrong's LITTLE WOMEN, ALL WE IMAGINE AS LIGHT.

I tried Pedro Almodovar's recipe for creative energy

hidden (tadaima) — Fri, 18 Sep 2026 21:23:00 +0000

In Mason Curry's Substack, he talked about a recent interview with fashion designer Colm Tóibín. In the interview, Tóibín talks about a secret recipe for endless creative energy recommended to him by filmmaker Pedro Almodovar:

"Yeah, he told me that this thing really worked. I think he was talking about actors. That if you gave it to an actress and then turned on the camera—I think that’s what happened. So just after I saw him that time, I was going to teach at the New School. It was a three-hour seminar. And I would do it right before. A double espresso, and—you let it cool. You put sugar into it, let it cool. And then you throw in a full bubbly Coca-Cola and drink it all down like medicine.

And you were—it took about an hour—but by the end, I mean, on fire. I became this sort of teacher who couldn’t stop. It’s really true that there was a complaint by the porters because they were closing up the school at ten. I would still be in full flight at ten. I would tell them, just go away for a while and then come back. The poor students had to listen to this. [...] No, it’s really great.

Obviously, after reading it I knew I had to try it myself. I researched it and, apparently, some people like to call it a "Texas Americano," which seems like the appropriate name for it. So, a few weeks ago, I went to the store and bought some tiny cans of Coke and some instant espresso powder (since I didn't own a Moka Pot or anything).

When I made it, I only did one shot of espresso instead of two. I had already had a cup of coffee that day and two shots of espresso just felt like overkill. I let it cool, per the instructions, and then poured a can of Coke in it. It tasted...okay. I probably could have finessed it with a splash of milk and added ice cubes and poured it into a cute mason jar, which would've really heightened the experience, but the instructions said to "down it like medicine," so I surmised I wasn't supposed to treat this like a "cute" experience, so downed it I did.

In the interview, Tóibín says the energy kicks in after an hour, but for me, it kicked in after 30 minutes. It wasn't a crazy amount of energy, but I did feel buzzy and awake, similar to the feeling you'd get drinking a Red Bull.

Unfortunately, just like Red Bull, after an hour the buzzy feeling wore off and I felt more tired than ever. After another hour, I could barely keep my eyes open. Altogether, I had about a good 30 minutes of energy before crashing, which was hardly worth the hassle of making the drink. (Perhaps I should've used two shots of espresso after all. And I was also supposed to add sugar to it, which I didn't do.)

Honestly, the best drink I've ever had that gave me endless energy without the inevitable crash was coca tea. It's unfortunately illegal in North America cause it's used to produce cocaine, but coca tea is just brewed natural coca leaves and only has small traces of alkaloids in it (compared to actual cocaine).

If you ever check into a hotel in Peru, they practically force the drink into your hand as soon as you arrive since it's a natural cure for altitude sickness. A hotel in Cusco I stayed in had a basket of coca leaves in all the rooms. During that trip, I drank coca tea more than coffee. You could easily drink five cups of that stuff without any of the side effects you'd get from caffeine overload.

Although I have no desire to live in Peru, my husband and I both agreed that we would permanently move there just for the coca tea. We even seriously considered illegally shipping some here to the US but ultimately decided it wasn't worth the risk.

Actually, you know what? This is about cocaine, isn't it? In the Tóibín interview, he compared his Coke/espresso drink to a safe, "legal" version of cocaine. Is this the true secret of creatives? We're all just secretly wishing for cocaine? And since we can't have it, we come up with these Temu knockoff versions instead? Weird.

But anyway, my final verdict on the crack juice? I think I'll stick to coffee.

I'm an Old Movie Guy

hidden (theoutsideman) — Fri, 18 Sep 2026 21:15:00 +0000

Just became aware of one Shea Serrano, author of the NYT bestseller MOVIES (AND OTHER THINGS). From the book's Amazon page:

INSTANT #1 NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER ★ WALL STREET JOURNAL BESTSELLER ★ BARNES & NOBLE BESTSELLER ★ AMAZON BESTSELLER

Bestselling author Shea Serrano is back with a book about film that combines the fury of a John Wick shootout, the sly brilliance of Regina George holding court at a cafeteria table, and the sheer power of a Denzel monologue, all into one.

"Movie buffs have no excuse not to lose themselves in this oddball book." ―The New York Times

Movies (And Other Things) is a book about, quite frankly, movies (and other things).

One of the chapters, for example, answers which race Kevin Costner was able to white savior the best, because did you know that he white saviors Mexicans in McFarland, USA, and white saviors Native Americans in Dances with Wolves, and white saviors Black people in Black or White, and white saviors the Cleveland Browns in Draft Day?

Reason I'm highlighting this dude is b/c an interview he gave in Esquire in 2019 made its way to my Twitter TL:

I’m not really an Old Movie Guy, and you chose to focus only on movies from the ‘80s—and really the ‘90s—on. Are you like me in that you don’t see a ton of appeal in movies older than that?

I'm with you on that. I watch old movies and I'm like, "No, thanks." They're not fun. It's clear they were still trying to figure out how to do things. Some of them, of course, were undeniable, like a Jaws or Star Wars or Indiana Jones. You watch those and you go, "Oh, I see in this the bones of what eventually became whatever action franchise.” Or Alien. [But mostly], they’re just not that fun to watch.

When I was working on the “Heist” chapter, I was reading best lists of heist movies. One that kept appearing on the list was this movie called Rififi. It's in black and white. Everybody talks about how great it was. They do this really cool trick in there where there's a long stretch of just straight-up silence while they try to break into wherever. I get it. That part was cool, and I imagine, at the time, it was really fun. But you watch it today, and it's just not that great.

Imagine an alleged music critic saying they're "not really an Old Music Guy" or book critic saying they're "not really an Old Book Guy," where "old" is anything before 1980. I mean, such people should not be allowed to write about their subjects. They should be laughed at, ignored, yet this is precisely the kind of person that now votes in the Sight & Sound poll. This dude was obviously promoted for DEI reasons, b/c someone decided that the movie world needs more guys who look like they should be writing a mediocre taco blog.

Naturally, he has a Substack and podcast.

summer reading program (I want that pizza!)

hidden (momentary) — Fri, 18 Sep 2026 20:55:06 +0000

Hi blog 👋 Long time no see. Things refuse to go swimmingly, huh. The scorched Summer has killed the grass, sapped the streams, and disrupted all outdoor regimens. My unemployed wastes have singed off the rest. I read 21 books last month, can you believe it? 12-year-old me would be chuckling about rookie numbers, gotta' bump those numbers up. "Now look here you little snot", I might respond. "Right about then you're a ravenous sponge and you sop up a new world every day." Nowadays I'm still a sponge, but one submerged under a log in the shallows of some green-covered pond and the stuff inside and outside has (more or less) equalized, only a few air bubbles left to displace. And I'm putting those air bubbles to use! Join me if you like as I tally up the most fervent month of reading I've had in decades:

Books of Blood, Vol. 3 // 1984 // Clive Barker
I've been off-and-on making my way through these early tales. They've been battered and bloody as hell, sometimes silly, sometimes a little too ripe for me. "Rawhead Rex" is probably THE standout of this last volume. Bit of a barnstormer. On the whole I'm more ready to get to some of his fully-featured novels. Some years back I was violently thrown off Scarlet Gospels, but I want to give Nightbreed-Barker some time in the sun, right around that potent twist when the 80's were leaning into the 90's.

Midnight Gospel // 2000 // Nalo Hopkinson
Launching into the cosmic Caribbean! (This had been sadly waiting on the shelf for ages, my copy exhibiting signs of some slight water damage.) Have read very little like it; honestly, it took me some time before I acclimated to the singular dialect. Even now I'm of a mind to return to it in audiobook form. With its structure and transdimensional folktale subject matter, through and through, it feels like a story that needs to be told.

The Princess Diarist // 2016 // Carrie Fisher
Another difficult read, this time for knowing how it all finally ended. There's a history in play here, I'm sure, of tell-all Old Hollywood tradition but it coincides with our realm of social media and tabloid/content churn. And Fisher's was a life there at the blockbuster epicenter of that change. A stark read, harrowing for how funny she is. The situation is complicated and time-worn. The poetry is young and aching. There's a dedication note about her mother that kinda wrecked me.

The Strange Bird // 2017 // Jeff Vandermeer
Part of the Borne universe (itself feeling like only a page or two removed from his Southern Reach). The book logging sites do that thing where they add a ".5" to a series chronology, slotted as this is in the midst of seemingly larger concerns. But there's nothing small about it. The same weighty themes of endless, cascading existence. How fucking fragile it all is, but also how tenacious. A villain-meddling bio-elastic horror show and an epic strand of continuance. Vandermeer is ecologically motivated beyond mere lifespans.

The Summer Book // 1972 // Tove Jansson
In its simple structure, a deeply felt collection more than the sum of any one part. Just as some distant Summer expands to fill entire realms of memory, so does this collection of days build its own towering kind of continuance. The activities and shifts in mood of its coastal dwellers highlight so well the absence felt in the family unit, and there's such a looping back between those just starting in life and those nearing the end of it. Human to the point of needing to cry out.

To the Lighthouse // 1927 // Virginia Woolf
The lighthouse remains, very much. Warding away yet always inviting approach. I'll admit the details are already hazy, but the family history here felt horizon-spanning in its way. A stream of shared inner-consciousness and generational insight. Maybe the details aren't so important, just the weight of lived lifes cut short, edited over, or forged anew.

A Canticle For Leibowitz // 1959 // Walter M. Miller, Jr.
Mid-century atomic-infused and illuminated Catholicism, ahoy? High concept firestarter, a whole heaping spoonful of pointed critique and (not so) alternate history analysis. It can be very kind to its institutions while still holding them, squirming, under the magnifying glass. The entire opening act of a lowly acolyte trying to preserve and protect his own patch of the venerated past will probably stay with me for some time.

Seasons of Glass and Iron // 2026 // Amal El-Mohtar
There is some intimate work here, and I do enjoy my time with her work. But her tag-team tour de force of This Is How You Lose the Time War put the itch in me years back and, for better or worse, I find myself always seeking snippets of THAT high every time I return to the well. At least two short stories rounded up in this collection allow me some of that breaking-the-world-over-your-knee level of queer energy; "To Follow the Waves" and "Florilegia, or, Some Lies About Flowers".

Mongrels // 2016 // Stephen Graham Jones
Up to this point my favorite of his has been the powerful novella Mapping the Interior, but I think here he somehow manages to sustain that potency for twice the length. Page after page the experience is visceral, the remembrance is tactile, the concerns are regional, class-based, racial. The critique, all-American. Blown away.

The Dream Master // 1966 // Roger Zelazny
Feels like one of those influential works where I prefer the things its influenced more than the source. I understand this might be the longer version of an earlier novella? Felt strung along a bit here in this one, so a concentrated treatment also sounds preferable. But this has still got some radical ideas floating around in its dream space. An unsettling scenario.

Beyond // 2022 // Horacio Quiroga
A collection originally published in 1935, this English translation is my first introduction to the Uruguayan author. Who sounds like he had a pretty rough fuckin' life, an unfortunate amount of it self-inflicted. The stories themselves make me want to read Poe [positive] and I'm encouraged to seek out more South American history and writing.

Querelle // 1947 // Jean Genet
Only the most considered gay prose, feeling like it's balanced on the balls of its feet ready to pounce forward with a switchblade if you let your guard down. Now, I did mostly enjoy my time here, but... I loved what Fassbinder ended up doing with it at da movies.

The Big Sleep // 1939 // Raymond Chandler
God, finally reading this and yeah... this really is the weathered, noir-soaked, middle-aged American ideal, huh? The obstinate bastard who sticks to his own code and cuts through the smoke and mirrors of the underworld, his form lurching forward through the whole genre. Kinda feels like he needs an audience at times, to hold forth against. Can see shadows of this guy still showing up in mid-life crisis dad-cinema.

The Leopard // 1958 // Giuseppe Lampedusa
Rich in detail and remembrance, and rightly so; the author himself was a goddamn Sicilian prince! That's actually kinda' nuts. The 60's film adaptation with Burt Lancaster was what prompted me to seek this out, and I would very much like to revisit that work with this book still a little fresh in mind. The cut of the literary prince feels tailor-made for Lancaster, whose bearing needs able to support the entire waning era of never-again nobility.

Children of Strife // 2026 // Adrian Tchaikovsky
I hadn't even realized he had been writing a fourth one. I tell you the speed with which I ordered a library copy. Children of Time is one of my favorite works of science fiction, and thankfully stand-alone should you want to check it out. It's the very best amalgam of balls-to-the-wall 'Big Idea' sci-fi and persevering comfort characters. (Even if those characters are a thousand generations of hyper-intelligent spiders!) The second novel dips into some survival horror and some wild expanding consciousness, then the third takes a different tack entirely and gives us a murky folktale "holodeck episode" for the series. This fourth outing further expands on every single idea established so far, while introducing an additional uplifted species with a really resonant backstory, along with a further fragmenting cast of billionaire-class humans to provide some truly reprehensible villainy.

Platform Decay // 2026 // Martha Wells
Ok, so this is the eighth one of these and I'll admit I'm getting a little tired of it. I think I expected more... development? At all? It's a rote action episode. Much more interested in what Ann Leckie is doing with her Ancilliaries. And on that note...

Lake of Souls // 2024 // Ann Leckie
Some original stories here, but I came to delve further into the worlds of the Imperial Radch and the Raven Tower and did not leave empty-handed. Hell, I'm already getting jazzed thinking about my eventual re-reads of both.

Sid Meier's Memoir! // 2020 // Sid Meier
One internet reviewer really set the tone when they called Sid Meier "the normiest of normies". The man has provided a great deal of my formative gaming memories, and this book gives me a lot of great BTS info surrounding the development of those games... but this "memoir" has barely the whiff of a human life behind it. Surely the man has experienced upheaval and sadness, but you wouldn't really know it. I'm left with the impression he made his way through the scene as 'just a dude' at the right place and right time; good-naturedly, and largely without having to consider his responsibility at most any point along the way.

Little Eyes // 2018 // Samantha Schweblin
Thrown off by the core scenario... at first. Came around towards the end when I realized I was still reading and couldn't quite stop myself. No surely we wouldn't behave this way, I could retort, knowing full well we kinda already do. Maybe it's sensationalized for effect, but our modern relationship to tech and privacy really is in free fall. We've come so far from 'netiquette' and chatrooms. Throw in the combustability of a Labubu-level collecting craze and always-on surveillance and you've got yourself an annoyingly on-the-nose appeal.

Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency // 1987 // Douglas Adams
Rest in peace, you rascally son of a gun. Narrative version of the magic trick where they keep pulling more and more hankerchief out their ass. Freewheeling, imaginative, and filled with some fun conversational volleys. Just the right amount of nonsense to get you through the week.

Bimbos of the Death Sun // 1987 // Sharyn McCrumb
And on a further 1987 note, this annoying artifact. Murder mystery at the nerd convention. There is a lot of affection here for the scene, and might be of historical interest in how it goes about portraying D&D, literally describing how a play session works to what I presume is a largely unaware 80's readership. But still dated as all hell and tiresome, in similar fashion to having run-ins with folks going "Oh you like [nerd thing], you would love Big Bang Theory"

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++

And that's that. See you next year! 😅 No no, I'm gonna try and be a little better about it. Never did get that regular website of mine together, so here's hoping I can cast a few more thoughts into this particular void without too terrible a lapse.

photo dump: a coruña

hidden (tomanotas) — Fri, 18 Sep 2026 20:51:00 +0000

Breve seleção de fotos feitas numa andança pela encantadora A Coruña num lindo dia de sol durante o verão de 2026.

Cliques feitos com uma Fujifilm XT30 II + Fujinon 27mm f/2.8 II R WR usando alguma receita (não lembro qual 😬) do @whoisgev.

Uma fachada anos 80 e uma furgoneta. Praia de Orzán. Praia das Amorosas. A caminho da Torre de Hércules. María Pita, heroína local. Concello da Coruña, na Praza de María Pita. Galerias envidraçadas típicas da Galícia. Igreja de Santiago (século XII). Cidade de Cristal, na Avenida da Marina. O barco Farelo.

Es politica baby

hidden (fran-cappiello) — Fri, 18 Sep 2026 20:44:34 +0000

Como unir un gobierno democratico elegido por la gente, como unir el ideal de la democracia, el ideal de personas poniendo su futuro, sus ideales en personas que tomen esas deciciones para afectar a las personas de todo un pais.

Como unir ese ideal puesto en una persona, en un grupo de personas;que consruyen sobre un ideal; con la propia humanidad de esas personas. Personas con carreras politicas que sostener, personas que participan dentro del juego de la politica.

Hace poco estaba mirando All the presidents man y solo podia pensar en lo profundo del mundo de la politica. Que significa participar dentro de nuestras democracias, especialmente si participar por ideales; por ideologias; es visto como una anomalia, como algo negativo.

Basicamente cual es el trabajo del político?

castaway

hidden (betweentheskyscrapers) — Fri, 18 Sep 2026 20:30:00 +0000

Starward I send the cast
foretold, fortuitous
desire-weaving with decadent thrusts
testing the physics of sand, it stands
but who were they, who applauded me?
meetings not recorded, not shared
I never got to tell them I cared
still trying to outrun history's collection
I'll go willingly okay, if I go at all
brave but small, weeds overgrown
yes I left clues, near fall's frightening jaunt
to a wayward soul, they're gone
but a child will find them if they want
ships of Theseus, crowding the dock
waking up each morning
in an already boiling pot
I said some things I didn't mean,
or I didn't mean what you think
anyway, it's been foggy for two weeks
and I think that deserves a drink
but there's no one here, no eyes, no hair
just a ceramic cat giving me a vacant stare

with ever more tepid hope I send my cast
tentically in all directions, to find at last
a temporary relief from rotting leaves
an unexpected and dream-like reprieve
I laugh if it's coming together, sweet Neroli
the dew on you, awakening in a field
golden tears and drops of silver steel
these are the things I use for my art
to draw people to something, I draw the unseen
communication- the nature of separate parts
to commune or commute, one requires a route
but routes are tricky, and words are sticky
and dead ends end up in scrapbooks
or ceremonial fires of new beginnings

I go back to memories that I don't want to lose
and put bookmarks in them like a fuse
that I can relight when all seems lost
(the artist seems to be rambling
as if he's his own muse)

~

March 2026

Disable Copilot in VS Code

hidden (iamrain) — Fri, 18 Sep 2026 20:21:23 +0000

Thank you, VSCode FAQ.

How can I remove Copilot from VS Code?

You can disable the built-in AI features in VS Code with the chat.disableAIFeatures setting, similar to how you configure other features in VS Code. This disables and hides features like chat or inline suggestions in VS Code and disables the Copilot extensions. You can configure the setting at the workspace or user level.

Day 4- Other post & scant thoughts

hidden (rosedragon) — Fri, 18 Sep 2026 20:19:32 +0000

Not a lot going on today. I've got a fancy dinner party for one of my parents' old law partners later- and I may even get to leave early! Not that I should... I need the networking! My week is now effectively free. Not fretting or anything, just pensive about what to do with my time.

Therapy went well and I liked making that comic! What did you think about it? I'll have more to share in due time which means more topics to make comics about. I think it'll actually encourage me to work more because drawing on those slips we use to track cars (I work as a valet) is really fun. Depends on the account, though... I might be running myself ragged for five hours plus sometimes. In the event that happens I'll just bring an extra slip home and use a locally-sourced sharpie to get the job done. Or any other pen! Who knows.

Happy Friday :)

Need To Fix My PSP

hidden (gitzandglory) — Fri, 18 Sep 2026 20:14:00 +0000

A year ago I bought a used PSP-1000 to mess around with and to play Monster Hunter Freedom Unite on it.

I played a lot of Monster Hunter (around 80-90 hours I think, only scratching the surface of high rank). Another favourite of mine was Work Time Fun, which I also sank a lot of hours into somehow.

I modded my PSP so I could run legally acquired game backups on it from a microSD card. I don't know what exactly I did to my PSP but I'm sure you can look up how to mod your own PSP on pspunk.com.

So I broke my PSP. Now what likely broke it over time, was my first hardware mod. I wanted to change my PSP's charging port with a USB-C port, and did a piss poor job. That was one of my first attempts at doing hardware mods and soldering in general, so this mod resulted in a lot of headaches. The console didn't fit together correctly, because I used really thick wires. And I broke the on/off switch, because I opened and closed the shell too many times.

After fiddling with that (and adding a better screen) I left the PSP at an ok state. The poorly made cutout for the new USB-C port was a bit ugly, and the hot glue holding the port wasn't the best glue, and now the port is loose inside this slot.

When I went to Vienna for my last Warhammer tournament, I did take my PSP with me to play some games before bed at the hotel. Problem was that I couldn't turn the console on. So I took out the battery pack and put it back it. Console started. So I played a few minutes and Boom! The PSP died. Also couldn't turn it on again. So out and back in came the batteries. Same story. Played a little, but this time I noticed that I knocked the PSP a little. Seems like the is some loose connection with the battery or maybe a short circuit happening somewhere if I knock the console. I am suspecting my poor attempt at the USB-C port.

So I might need to open this little guy up, and see if I can fix that problem. I did some Guitar Hero Controller Arduino Mods in the past year, so I hope I my soldering and general messing around with electronics skills have gotten good enough to handle this.

Now I did order a funky clear case, and a replacement part for the original charging port, but that was a long time ago. I didn't bother trying to make the case swap, since it looked like a really overwhelming project.

Now I think, I might need to really do the shell swap. I did cut some parts of the PSPs plastic innards to fit the USB-C port, so replacing the port with the replacement part probably won't work, since the screw hole is gone.

Maybe I'll try my hand on Sunday. Need to rewatch Total Kommando's guide.

Day 3- Comics At Work 1

hidden (rosedragon) — Fri, 18 Sep 2026 20:08:00 +0000

I made this yesterday so this is a daily upload still smiles

Some careers' views of AI

hidden (more) — Fri, 18 Sep 2026 19:55:21 +0000

Software developers

The 2025 Stack Overflow Developer Survey found 78% of respondents use AI tools in their development process, up from 62% in 2024 and 44% in 2023 (the first year it was asked). A majority are still favorable, but favorability and trust both fell:

60% are very favorable or favorable, down from 72% in 2024 and 76% in 2023;
33% trust the accuracy of AI output, down from 43% in 2024 and 42% in 2023.

The most common frustration, cited by 66%, was output that is "almost right, but not quite."

31% use AI agents.

Physicians

The American Medical Association's 2026 survey found 72% of physicians use at least one AI tool in their practice (with 9% unsure), up from 48% in 2024 and 38% in 2023. 76% say AI gives them an advantage in caring for patients, up from 69% in 2024 and 65% in 2023. The most common uses were summarization (e.g., research) (39%) and drafting (e.g., care plans) (30%).

The survey asked physicians how AI would help or harm various dimensions of their work. Most physicians thought AI was helpful for most dimensions, especially work efficiency (78% to 7%) and diagnostic ability (74% to 11%). The only surveyed dimension where more respondents expected AI to harm than to help was patient privacy (13% to 41%).

Physicians were split but mildly favorable on patients using AI themselves for medical tasks. A majority at least sometimes wanted patients to use AI for questions about medications and their side effects (68%, vs. 17% never or rarely); general health questions (64%, vs 15%); and personalized health questions (55%, vs 24%). Almost half didn't want patients using it for interpreting radiology reports (46% never or rarely, vs 31% sometimes or definitely) or pathology results (49% never or rarely, vs 31% sometimes or definitely).

70% are very or somewhat concerned about AI eroding the skills of medical students and residents. 28% are similarly concerned about their own skills. Respondents ranked clear liability frameworks as their top regulatory priority.

Teachers

A 2025 Gallup survey of 2,232 US public K–12 teachers found 60% used AI (32% at least weekly, 28% less often), and 40% not at all. The most common uses were preparing to teach (37% of teachers at least monthly) and making worksheets or activities (33%). Weekly users reported saving 5.9 hours a week on average.

Teachers who used AI for a task were asked how it affected the quality of their work on that task. For every task, a majority said it made their work somewhat or much higher quality, from 57% for grading/feedback to 74% for administrative work.

In a 2025 survey of 806 middle and high school teachers by the Center for Democracy and Technology (a tech policy nonprofit), 85% had used AI in the 2024–25 school year, counting school-provided tools. 70% worry AI keeps students from learning critical skills.

Game developers

The 2026 GDC State of the Game Industry survey of "over 2,300" game industry professionals found 36% use generative AI at work: 30% at game studios versus 58% at publishers, support companies, and marketing firms, and 47% of upper management versus 29% of lower-level staff. The most common uses were research or brainstorming (81%), followed by everyday tasks like email and code assistance (47% each).

52% thought generative AI was having a negative impact on the industry, up from 30% in 2025 and 18% in 2024, while 7% thought it was having a positive impact, down from 13% in 2025. Views were most negative among artists (64%), designers and narrative writers (63%), and programmers (59%); and most positive among executives and business staff (both 19%).

A mid-2025 Google Cloud survey run by the Harris Poll (615 game developers in the US, South Korea, Norway, Finland, and Sweden, mid-2025) found 90% integrate generative AI into their workflows. It's not really clear why this number is so much higher.

Lawyers

The ABA's 2024 Legal Technology Survey of 512 private attorneys found 30% use AI, with higher proportions at larger firms (46% at firms of 100+ attorneys, 18% of solo attorneys). (I couldn't find a 2025 survey, much less 2026; not sure why.)

A 2026 Legal Industry Report (cf LawSites coverage) from 8am, a legal software company (which sells AI, but also a lot of other stuff, so expect some sampling bias, but I thought some of the secondary questions were still interesting), surveyed "more than 1,300" legal professionals and found 69% personally use general-purpose generative AI tools for work, up from 31% and 27% in its previous two years' surveys. The most common uses were drafting correspondence and general research (58% each), brainstorming (54%), and summarization (47%). On AI's long-term impact on the legal profession, 54% are very or somewhat optimistic, 26% are neutral, and 20% are very or somewhat pessimistic.

Artists

A 2023 survey by Lovato et al. of 459 self-identified artists, recruited significantly through social media but with an extra phase to match the demographics of the US art workforce, found 62% agreed that AI models are a threat to art workers, while 45% agreed that AI models are a positive development for art. 22% agreed with both statements (!). 48% had used AI to generate art.

A 2026 survey by Jiang et al. of 378 professional visual artists, recruited mostly through the lead author's social media network, found 85% never use generative AI in their work, and 88% never use image generation. 99% dislike generative AI, 92% strongly.

An early-2026 survey from Adobe (which, obviously, sells AI tools) found "nearly 9 in 10 creatives say generative AI has made their work better". 46% said job opportunities had gone up, while 30% said they had declined.

Musicians

A 2023 survey of 15,073 members of the French and German music rights societies Sacem and GEMA found 35% had used AI in their music work, up to 51% among those under 35. 19% refuse to use AI, and another 26% would rather not. 64% think the risks of AI use outweigh the opportunities; 71% worry AI use threatened their income and future.

Writers

A 2025 survey by BookBub (a book promotion service) of 1,229 authors, mostly self-published, found 45% use generative AI for their work. Among those, the top use cases were research (81% at least "occasionally"), marketing copy or art (~74%), outlining/plotting (~72%), and editing/proofreading (~70%). 48% don't use it and don't plan to. Of those not using it, the most common reason was that it was unethical (84%).

General public

(Not really a career, but whatever)

Pew's February 2026 survey of 5,119 US adults found 49% use AI chatbots, up from 33% in 2024; 24% use them daily or more. The most common use was searching for information (42%). 38% of employed adults used it for tasks at work.

The survey asked respondents how AI would help or hurt some aspects of their lives. People were positive on their productivity (30% helps, 5% hurts), how informed they are (28% helps, 5% hurts), and their creativity (21% helps, 11% hurts); while more even and indifferent on their happiness (8% helps, 5% hurts) and their relationships (6% helps, 7% hurts).

In a June 2026 Pew survey, 52% said the increased use of AI in daily life makes them more concerned than excited, which has been roughly stable since 2023 but increased from 37% in 2021 and 38% in 2022. 9% are more excited than concerned, also stable since 2023 but down from 18% in 2021 and 15% in 2022.

Her favorite flower was a rose

hidden (aworkinprogress) — Fri, 18 Sep 2026 19:53:00 +0000

My last moments with my grandmother.

I've already built several pages for the website but hadn't decided on a favicon. Not necessary, but important for the website's completion.

I sat down and looked at the photo album page again and it dawned on me:

Her favorite flower was a rose.

Was that why she chose this particular cover, or was merely a coincidence? Maybe she didn't select it at all and it was given to her by someone else. One can only speculate.

阿嬤 was the glue that kept the family together. She insisted that my sister and I remain close to my father's side of the family after he deserted us and even after my parents' official divorce. She made sure the grandchildren grew up together, even though our cousins were from Bolivia. (They later moved to Arkansas, which is quite far from California.)

When she died, the bonds died with her. It was as if the uncles and aunts held on for her sake. I think she'd be quite disappointed with how we all ended up.

However, it's not without cause. While I admire certain things about 阿嬤, she wasn't perfect. She was a staunch traditionalist who kept people together even though they were probably best apart. There were other things, but I'd rather keep those to myself.

I wonder what she'd think of this project? Would she approve or think I'm just being sentimental? When I told her I loved her, she slapped me on my shoulder and said, "Aiyah." That was when she was still healthy.

The next time we told her we loved her was the last time we saw her. My mom, sister, and I all flew to Taiwan to say goodbye. We stayed there for a week. I spent the entire week lying in bed next to her while my family went out and about. I didn't want to miss a single second. She told me things that she never told anybody. I later told my sister, but there are some things I couldn't bear to share with my mother, because I know she'd resent her for it.

The last moment was the most difficult. Both my sister and I laid next to her in bed.

"It's time to go," my uncle said quietly.

We wailed like small children, clinging onto her body. We told her we loved her. And surprisingly, she cried too and held onto us. I still remember being ushered out of the room; the last image I saw of my grandmother was her outstretched arms, reaching out in the darkness.

阿嬤 always acted tough. I think that was how she was brought up and how she survived in this world. So to see her giving into her emotions made her mortal, like the rest of us. It was then when I realized she was really dying. And that she really loved us.

Shit. I didn't expect to write all of that. I've got tears in my eyes now. There are some memories I try not to think about too much, because I read somewhere that the more you think about old memories, the more you distort them over time. And there are some memories I want to preserve, forever.

So, in conclusion, I've selected a rose to be the website's favicon. However, I'm keeping the favicon on the blog as a mahjong tile because the main image is of my grandpa and she hated him until the very end.

My grandpa was buried next to her against her dying wishes. So I'll give them their respective spaces on the internet.

沛君

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Generative AI in video games

hidden (halinu) — Fri, 18 Sep 2026 19:48:00 +0000

I'm a big fan of the Yo-kai Watch video games by LEVEL-5 (slice of life RPG meets monster collecting), so you'd think I'd be thrilled that they announced they're remaking Yo-kai Watch 2. I truly thought the series was dead when LEVEL-5 stopped localising the games in North America and they started to bomb in Japan due to oversaturation after they released approximately 8 billion games over the course of seven years.¹ Yeah, you'd think I'd be shouting my excitement from the rooftops (I did tear up a little bit when I saw the news) and telling everyone I know about it, whether they cared or not. You'd think so… except for the big generative AI problem.

LEVEL-5's CEO and president, Akihiro Hino, has been a huge proponent of generative AI in game development. I only found this out recently, which is a damn shame because I've been a fan of LEVEL-5's games for ages.² It really soured my enthusiasm for Yo-kai Watch's revival. After LEVEL-5's stream showcase last week was suffused with bad generative AI environments and avatars, my worries were only magnified when I started to see some really concerning generative AI markers in their promotional materials for both Yo-kai Watch and Holy Horror Mansion.

Why does the sidewalk change behind the utility pole?

My feelings on the matter were so full up that I actually started writing an article about it.³ I finished the first draft of the article the other day and it outlines some of the suspect items like the above sidewalk segment and these weird powerlines:

Why are there five wires in one segment and four in the others?

I had sourced some articles going over how LEVEL-5 was using generative AI in their development, including using ChatGPT to concoct narrative-driven quests⁴ in their upcoming crime RPG, Decapolice. I definitely didn't want to cry ~~wolf~~ AI without information to back up my issues. Then something strange happened.

Akihiro Hino apologised for the AI usage. From his tweet, he linked to a statement on LEVEL-5's official site going over some of the problems the fans had brought up in the last week or so. My Japanese is pretty rudimentary so I had to rely on a Google translation of the site. LEVEL-5 did go over the powerlines from the image above, stating it's being mistaken for AI but was actually done by hand by their designer.

I am honestly not sure what I believe. I suppose it could have been human error, though it looks noticeably wrong. I guess there have also been artists who have accidentally put six fingers on a hand before too. (Not sarcasm, FYI.)

LEVEL-5 goes on to say — in summation — nuh-uh, you're wrong it's not AI but we're sowwy you're confused. To be fair, the tone and general feel of the statement is lost with Google translate, so I can only go off the translation I'm reading.

I feel icky about the whole thing, though. I don't know if I should finish my article after all. I would like to, but I'm not sure about LEVEL-5 or their methods anymore. They could be disingenuous or telling the bald truth — I really don't know. I guess I just don't trust the studio anymore. It's heartbreaking to see something you love so much go through the ringer and come out with the stink of generative AI on it. I almost wish Yo-kai Watch had stayed dead.

Okay, so it's only 20 games over seven years, but that's still a lot.↩
Fantasy Life is another LEVEL-5 series I've loved since its inception on the 3DS.↩
I'm starting to Do The Thing I mentioned in my post about changing the system! I'm trying to write more serious articles to be published on my website! It's exciting when The Thing actually happens.↩
In all fairness to Hino, I've only found this one article without further sources. Hino has never addressed this concern from what I can find.↩

Why Writing Is Difficult (for me, at least)

hidden (wtch) — Fri, 18 Sep 2026 19:40:00 +0000

Writing sometimes feels like an exercise in self-humiliation.

My fingers feel clunky on the keyboard, and my pen leaves splotches of ink on the page as words pile up and become stuck behind my teeth. I question whether I have anything worthwhile to say; I question if I have anything to say at all. I'm terrified of saying the wrong thing, of hitting post on something that is incorrect, even when the thing I am saying is my own opinion. Opinions can be wrong. I know this to be true, after all, there are people who like the 2005 Pride and Prejudice movie best of all available adaptations.

The fear of being wrong is sort of humorous, especially in the era that we currently inhabit. Misinformation is rampant, and far too many people are addicted to chatbots that are likely to be as incorrect as your loudest and most ignorant uncle. The mere idea of being viewed in the same way causes waves of shame and fear to course through my body, revulsion shuddering through my entire being. I am not the most educated person in the world, so I find myself second guessing each and every one of my thoughts and opinions the moment I go to speak them aloud to another. Sometimes I wonder if life would be easier if I were not afraid to be loud and wrong?

It is something that I would like to work on. I'd like to learn to express myself better, particularly in a written format. I have far fewer issues with expressing myself in conversations, where I have far less time to second guess the things coming out of my mouth. I also believe that getting things wrong and doing things poorly is often the first step in the learning process, and I like to learn.

So. My plan is to write, as often as I can bring myself to do so, and to post the things I write here as a form of exposure therapy. I suppose we shall see if it helps me improve.

What do you plan to write?

A very good question. Currently I am planning to try my had at creating reviews of some GM-less TTRPG's that I have forced people to try with me in recent months. I also occasionally try my hand at some poetry (not just fridgles, I promise). Perhaps I will also try my hand at some writing prompts, I have not written any prose since the last time I felt motivated to write some (rather poor) smutty fanfiction for a niche, but very active, fandom.

How often do you plan to write?

As often as I can without causing me to despise the whole idea. I struggle with meeting deadlines, and would rather not burn out on the idea before I truly begin.

What writing tools are you using?

I'm trying to finally get my head around Ellipsus, allowing me to write on any of my devices. I'm also nothing things down in a funky hand bound notebook and my favourite green Waterman Expert Mk 1 fountain pen.

0079

hidden (showgirls) — Fri, 18 Sep 2026 19:36:52 +0000

It took us almost three weeks and finally we have her full attention. The small head tilt and steady gaze, designed acting work, work great in the edit but in this loop they lose to the rib-eating lady in the background. Vicious performance.