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Participating in Walk MS in Philadelphia

2026-04-13T16:54:00+00:00

Most of the time I can walk normally. If I walk for too long or it's a warmer day, my body warms up and my walking starts looking more like someone who's had too much to drink. Such is life with Multiple Sclerosis.

At the start of the year after my flare, I couldn’t walk on my own. I took it one day at a time, and gradually my nervous system adapted around my spinal cord lesion until I was able to walk mostly normally again. This is something I don't take for granted.

I'm putting my ability to walk into something useful and participating in Walk MS this May in Philadelphia. If I get too warm and need help, my partner will be there to hang onto me. It'll be totally worth it.

Multiple sclerosis really sucks. There are treatments that can slow progression, but they’re expensive and there’s still no cure. You don't know me and I don't know you, but I would be grateful for any donation towards my Walk MS fundraiser. 💛 Link is below.

Walk MS Fundraiser

photo: a gift

2026-04-13T16:52:00+00:00

04-05-26: a stranger gifted me flowers when I told them about my graduation!

Once More, with Feeling

2026-04-13T16:47:13.143895+00:00

Sometimes I get too self-aware and think I repeat myself too much. Most of my writings tend to circle around the same half dozen topics, revisited rehashed rediscussed from one end to another. Sometimes I change minds and contradict my own self in the past. Sometimes I gain a new resolve. It's part of the beauty of being human, I think, that we grow and step into a new self in this circular path.

Mulling over the same thing can be unhealthy, but writing (and speaking, if it suits you more) is a method for us to process whatever is percolating in our brains. We shan't be so afraid of repeating ourselves. In fact, I'm partial to the notion of revisiting the central themes of our philosophy more often.

Perhaps it was academia ruining it for us. School drilled in our mind the sin of self-plagiarizing, but outside the labyrinthine world of citations and attributions, what difference does it make from continually publishing working drafts? Our daily life is not plagued by publish or perish (or at least, I sure hope so). Your writing does not have to contain new thoughts. If your findings after several years are nothing more than "this still holds true for me", that's a valuable insight in regards to our life as a whole.

Many authors do in fact write more than one book dealing with a certain topic. Sometimes they are merely quick cash grabs designed to follow after a particularly good reception, sometimes they are the kind of beast we just described. Deeper take, shallower scope, entirely different viewpoint. To turn the topic around, a marble in our hands, to polish it, test it, stretch it, ultimately finding a little bit of truth in it.

Perhaps by doing so, we can inch closer to the form we seek in our mind's eye.

Paranoia Beckons

2026-04-13T16:44:42.549625+00:00

The saga of Manju mama has finally come to a close yesterday.

And to celebrate that, we bought Pizza 4ps (courtesy Shrishti and her cousins), no clue why she's pissed though because I didn't speak to her brothers?

But anyhow, after a whole week of manju mama we finally convinced him to leave last Sunday. He'd given us a beautiful treat at Sattvam and gave us some money to spend on! In all honesty, we bad-mouthed him a lot. And some of it was warranted, I'd say we were a bit too harsh. Hearing his story really did change our perspective on him a lot. Sure, he's loud and talks too much about himself and really eats your head, but that's a consequence of the life he's lived. And it isn't really a poetic one either.

144th rank in IIT, peers all accomplished. Raghuram Rajan, his batchmate (IIT-Delhi tho), all in the grasp of his hands. Yet he drops out to join Isckon. I will never forgive Isckon for ruining his life. And the fact that he doesn't blame Isckon even a bit screams to me the fact that Isckon is a cult. They don't worship Krishna, neither do they live by his words. It's a cult for that Prabhupada and a cabal conquered by that Madhupandit Das.

It's truly sad. And to hear how is family is living? I was honest when I said I really didn't want to be him. I hope my trajectory doesn't go along that route. I will have to put more efforts.

But yeah, I think that sequence of events really brought me, mum and supra closer. United against a common enemy (/j), but it was real fun.

I've gotten a new frame, I feel I'm looking sexier (hahaha). It's Cheetah print so you know I'm feeling like Stanley Tucci. I don't know why but I feel as I grow older I'm going to become desi Stanley Tucci. And if I'm complimeneted so, oh boy I will pay them a million dollars.

I've started to plan my week, plan my days and act on it. Today was Day 1 and it was a partial success. Last Sunday, I sat and chronicled a bunch of to-dos to complete at the end of the week. And I guess I'm on track, 1/7th of the way there!

Today I also finally went to the temple to see Maa Kali. As usual she was gorgeous, and I could see signs that she was glad to see me. Traffic was clear, no signals and I had a good day today. So you know she wanted me to drop-by :) But on the bright side, I got recognized as a local too!

The purohit greeted me saying, how was your day and what + where your duty is! I felt like a temple local and was offered Peda by the temple ajji. Oh man, I'm so, so happy for this. This really was the highlight of my dad (ahahahaha). They treat me as one of them!

I'm registering for the CFA tomorrow. And will commit to a GRE day once I get my salary in May. It's getting serious here and I want to commit to my future. Take myself seriously. Dressing well (bought new undies) and planning my day are a part of it, but so is also building steps to a longer future. I've started GRE prep, but I'm disappointed by how dumb I am in mathematics. I spoke to mom and dad about it, and their re-assurances were the same -- practice makes man perfect. If you get it wrong 3 times, try 5. If wrong 5 times, try 10. Sooner or later, you'll get it. And they're right. I know it too. But I just needed to hear it from somebody. To hear that they've been through the same and hear what they did, and what I need to do is the same. Put more effort.

I still feel dumb, but I know what I have to do. I need more effort. I'm kind of worried as I see the people around me. Saving more, investing more and well-planned. I'm afraid of being left behind of being deemed mediocre. But I've started to take steps. To move ahead. To invest in myself.

Dressing well, planning my dad, bearing more responsibility. Discipline, self-control and cosnsitency. I'm trying to bring them in me. I want to be a man that my parents can be proud of. To do that this year, is to score 335+ in GRE and crack CFA L1.

Weekly: April 13, 2026

2026-04-13T16:37:53.242475+00:00

Veilguard: A bit of queer theology

One of the things I appreciate about Veilguard is this little bit of Lace Harding struggling with pronouns within her new-found theology. It's something I've had to work through myself.

Waiting on the Bus (In the rain, in the rain)

Consciousness was the first split introduced into the mind after the separation

2026-04-13T16:36:00+00:00

ACIM T-3.IV.2:1-5

Consciousness, the level of perception, was the first split introduced into the mind after the separation, making the mind a perceiver rather than a creator. Consciousness is correctly identified as the domain of the ego. The ego is a wrong-minded attempt to perceive yourself as you wish to be, rather than as you are. Yet you can know yourself only as you are, because that is all you can be sure of. Everything else is open to question.

Thème Maevis 1.0

2026-04-13T16:25:00+00:00

Version initiale du thème Maevis pour la plateforme Bear.

/*
* Maevis — Un thème élégant et minimaliste pour Bear
* Version 1.0.0 | 13/04/2026
* Ludovic Namurois aka Falko | palimpseste.blog
*/

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a weeper in the sheets

2026-04-13T16:18:19.133026+00:00

The history of Man O'War¹. Not the band ², the naval Warhammer³ spin-off. Loved them gyrocopters … this makes me nostalgic for Epic: Space Marine⁴.
Here's an embarrassing story about how my brother and i came to know Epic: On one of our weekly hobby store visits, he grabbed a box containing a couple of Rhinos — a small tank, mainly used as troop transports —, thinking we made a great deal. After we got over our naivety, painting them was a breeze, and we started saving up for the starter box and for a while it became the main game for our small group.

What does a father do when his kid asks him about Seppuku⁵? Why call up the Wikipedia page and really getting into the whole thing, while forgetting, that he is talking to a kid who's started school »yesterday«. And that not even 24h after he witnessed a grandmother hitting her grandkid. When she was called out for her behaviour — the sibling of the hit kid signed for help — clasping the thumb with the other fingers —, she calmly replied that she's gentle in comparison to the parents. The police was involved, which took their data and will probably relay them to child care services, and yeah, fingers crossed. The Wife works with similar cases, and she said Granny was already a tough nut. Later Kirby asked, if it is usual for caretakers to hit their wards, and like i'd do later with ritual suicide⁵, i peeled off a layer of the magic of childhood…

Last week's comics were a disappointment. Transformers has become a trade trap, the story might go somewhere along the way, i'm just not willing to spend a fiver a month for the trip. Same for The fury of Firestorm.
Started reading Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Journeys — the fourth volume of the classic series, that is written by Peter Laird —, which isn't by any means a lesson in compressed storytelling, yet had the lived in quality i like these days. Yes, it's also the continuation of a long running story that allowed its characters to age. Yes, i'm expecting too much from comics, but Transformers started out so good by just not giving a damn, and ironically, since Kirkman took over, it has become some a of ironic save space, due to being part of a shared franchise; again… Waiting for the Holograms to show up … and Rom, and the Micronauts and whatever else Hasbro can pull out.

My birthday happened, and it was amazing. Turned off my phone, and the Wife and Kirby did not mention it in any way, shape or form. That day is one i'm not particularly fond off, with the depression and constant feeling of not being adequate enough for anything, and therefore wishing to have never been signed for this rodeo.
The following day, my body acted up, sending me into a panic spiral, which made me do something for the first time, getting back into bed and pulling the sheets over the head, crying. Got myself in a shape, that was suitable enough to visit my doctor, who said i need a break. I had a break once, and it cost me my job, and it took me years to claw my way back; and i'm not confident in being able to do it again.

Previous |

The history of Man O'War // youtube.com↩
Manowar // wikipedia.org↩
Warhammer // wikipedia.org↩
Epic (Tabletop Game) // wikipedia.org↩
Seppuku // wikipedia.org↩

Your world, your blog

2026-04-13T16:16:00+00:00

Having a hard time coming up with ideas for what to blog about?

Maybe you just need a little push in the right direction. Something to get you past that writer's block.

Here are three great topics to get you going:

Anything
Whatever
Whatnot

Don't overthink your blogging.

It's your blog, write about whatever you feel like. Your blog is not a billboard, it's a friend. And true friends can talk about anything, right?

Whatever you write about, no one else could have written it. Because you wrote it from your perspective, from your corner of the world, based on your life experiences.

Now go write. Nobody else can.

Pesquisa - Ángel Adrián Guido Rojas, 16 años de edad

2026-04-13T15:48:00+00:00

Ensenada, B.C., a 13 de abril de 2026.- La Fiscalía General del Estado solicita la colaboración ciudadana para localizar a Ángel Adrián Guido Rojas, de 16 años de edad. Fue visto por última vez el 12 de abril de 2026, en la colonia 89, en la ciudad de Ensenada.

Media filiación: Complexión delgada, tez morena, cabello color café oscuro, ojos color café oscuro y rasgados.

Señas particulares: Cicatriz queloide en el antebrazo derecho.

Vestimenta: Sudadera gris con un logo de un puma blanco, pantalón de mezclilla azul marino y tenis blancos marca Reebok.

Cualquier información sobre su paradero se agradece comunicarse al número de la Fiscalía: (646) 152-25-00, extensiones 2559 y 2560; al número de emergencias 911; o mediante una llamada anónima al 089.

How Do We Fix the Incentives?

2026-04-13T15:39:13.458346+00:00

Donald Trump and Joe Biden are symptoms of several problems that come from bad incentives. The two-party system in the United States is broken due to bad incentives. It attracts bad actors, grifters, and cons.

Meaningful solutions must include two components. Term limits for the House and the Senate. Cumulative service should be capped at 12 years in the Legislative Branch. We also need age limits. I think that should be capped at age 70. National office should be barred for people who would enter office at that age.

This would mean anyone interested pursuing national politics would be limited to 20 years (12 in the Legislative Branch, and 8 in the Executive Branch). Supreme Court Justices should be retired by age 75. Senators and Congressmen retired by age 70.

This would trigger healthy turnover in the all three branches of national governance in the United States. Until we come to grip with bad incentives for political figures, the situation won’t improve.

What do you think? How can we get Federal Governance that debates real problems in rational ways? I know this kind of change is difficult, but if enough voters insist, it can happen.

Bruce Lee's Wisdom for Daily Living

2026-04-13T15:36:42.963624+00:00

The Mastery Multiplier: Why "Years of Experience" is a Vanity Metric

Years of experience is a vanity metric. What actually matters is quality. The difference between a veteran and a novice isn't just the calendar years on their resume; it’s the density of focus within those years.

I’ve been thinking about how Bruce Lee approached mastery. It wasn't about how long he was in the gym; it was about the quality of the minutes he spent there. 10 years of "going through the motions" will always lose to 2 years of obsessive, deliberate practice.

To formalize this, we can look at "Total Mastery" as a product of time and intensity. In mathematical terms, your progress is not a linear function of time ( $T$ ), but a product of time and the quality of your engagement ( $Q$ ).

The Mastery Formula

$M = T \times Q^{2}$

Where:

$M$ (Mastery): Your actual skill level and impact.
$T$ (Time): The years or hours you’ve put in (the baseline).
$Q$ (Quality): Your focus, presence, and the "quality multiplier."

In this model, Quality is squared. While time is linear, the way you use that time acts as an exponential multiplier. If your quality is zero, your mastery stays at zero, regardless of how many years ( $T$ ) you’ve been in the industry.

The Takeaway

Stop counting the years on your resume and start counting the "deep work" hours in your day.

Time is the investment.
Quality is the interest rate.

Are you just "clocking in" for a decade, or are you narrowing your focus to become truly dangerous in your field? Bruce Lee captured this perfectly in his personal philosophy:

"To spend time is to pass it in a specified manner. To waste time is to expend it thoughtlessly or carelessly. We all have time to either spend or waste and it is our decision what to do with it. But once passed, it is gone forever."

Chasing Cherry Blossoms

2026-04-13T15:35:00+00:00

We took our nephews to the annual cherry blossom festival yesterday but we parked too far that we didn't actually get the full experience.

Turns out the prettiest tree we found was the one standing over our beautiful Luna.

Block

2026-04-13T15:30:47.831999+00:00

Looks like it's not just fiction writing that I have a block, but now blog writing.

Oops.

Going, Going, Gone

2026-04-13T15:17:00+00:00

I have now left almost every place with little to no contact of what was formerly connected to me. I do not want to be associated with anything I have made in the past and any platform that people have found me on and perceived me to be. What I was and am and will be to you is all a mere perception of what you created out of me and what image of myself I have so carefully intended to construct through every pixel and byte I have built for own page on the internet that is not even barely mine.

Even then it is not all pure and objective because you will have developed biases in your lifetime of whatever degeneracy and misery you have accustomed yourself to, and me never honest due to this pressure placed on me atmosphere per atmosphere by every one person that I have once held not even dear and the ones I will have to hold in the future expecting me to be nothing but clean and bright and everything wonderful that you have proven yourself to be far off from yet still have audacity to play pretend for, to yourself and to others.

I don't know who on earth in the likes of you are still looking up the stuff I write but my former site is no longer active because the thought of any of my thoughts coming in contact with people as putrid as you whom I have come in contact with is enough to make me wish to submerge my insides in hydrogen peroxide, scrub off my skin with isopropyl alcohol, and drench all the clothes that cover me yet unable to protect me in chlorine. Better yet, if I could autoclave myself, I so gladly would.

The air you breathe is enough to poison a room. Whatever you touch ends up rotting itself away. Whoever hears you speak ends up deaf. Your doings are of nothing but ill will. Your soul tar and your presence miserable, I wonder how on earth and in hell you even manage to get people to love and like you, and how you live about your day to day as if bearing no guilt, in fact proud of what you have made of yourself.

You are evil, though I am no more pure and sanctified than you are. You will live your days aloof to your faults, I haunted by your deeds, cursing you thus cursing myself. My faults too unclean and plague me worse. We are both sinners opposite as we are. May Lord have mercy on us both.

#autocardiotomy #blogging

Morning Views From Behind the Tint

2026-04-13T15:12:50.381976+00:00

I went outside this morning for a bit of a walk. My supposedly arthritic knee is doing better than it was a few months ago but I’ve learned… if I push it too far, I’ll regret it.

Yep. I said “supposedly arthritic”. Just consider it my last stubborn ounce of denial, humor me, and let’s move on with my story 🙃

Back inside the van…

I’m thinking about making coffee when movement out my tinted side window distracts me.

I see a gorgeous red Cardinal bouncing around my campsite.

He munches on delicacies scavenged from the ground.

Soon a yellow finch joins the breakfast festivities.

The birds all seem to like the dandelion stems. And there’s plenty for everyone!

A brown bird (some sort of Sparrow?!) pops in for a few tasty morsels. He almost blends in with the ground.

So many birds, so many colors!…

Black birds with velvety blue necks waltz around my campsite (I think these are Common Grackles). They walk so fast I can’t get a clear picture.

And wouldn’t you know, the elusive Robin stops by for its share of the feast!

Apparently spring has sprung here in southern Illinois 🌹

Parting thoughts…

I always wish I could get pictures that weren’t taken thru my tinted window - because the tint makes the photos look different.

Then again, since I can’t be seen behind my tinted windows, I’ve gotten to see some pretty cool things.

Most of what I see are of the animal kind. Others are of the human kind.

The animal viewings always amaze me and make me smile.

The human viewings usually make me shake my head and wonder what the heck they were thinking.

And now, I’m off to make that coffee!

Until the next little moment,
Connie 🌼

❀ ❀ ❀

Life Right Now

My Whereabouts → Hanging out at a campground in southern Illinois for a few days
Heading To → Northwest Illinois - arriving April 17 or April 20 (I haven’t decided yet)
Enjoying → Some peaceful, relaxing, “me” time 🥰

❀ ❀ ❀

📝 Send me a note
📜 Previous •

お遊戯会

2026-04-13T15:10:00+00:00

新しいプロジェクトが入って、運よく抜けれた会議にまた戻ることになった

よくあんな1時間も喋れるなって思う

話のペースがカタツムリ

だいたいメンバー同士話噛み合わないことも多い

びっくりするくらい噛み合ってないし合わすつもりもない人もいるし

何十分と話した結果がじゃ、検証しますねとかだし（最初の3秒でわかってたやろ）

そういう会議でも聞いてないといけないし

若手がやるならまだしもおじさん達よ

お遊戯会ですか?

本当にストレスだから出たくない

でも出ろって言われたから出るしかない

Monday

2026-04-13T15:06:00+00:00

After a weekend of standup comedy, a super fun festival-concert-picnic, and a ████████ turn of events, I kicked off the week with one of my colleagues hosting a movie night in the office after the day ended. He is also from California, and besides being fluent in Chinese, he is now studying Mongolian, where he has had extended stays in the past. Freakin' epic, man.

Anyways, the movie tonight was a Mongolian film and the first Mongolian movie I have ever seen at that. It's called If Only I Could Hibernate (2023) and is essentially about the struggle of living below-the-poverty line. It's even more gut-wrenching when the main character is a young teen, struggling between not dropping out of school and doing his best to keep his younger siblings from starving. I won't spoil too much, but man, there is an emotional breakdown scene that hit all of us watching pretty hard.

It's beautifully shot, but a hard movie to recommend with its subject matter—I typically make group movie nights either a comedy or so-bad-that-it's-good kind of night. BUT it actually was quite nice to watch a different kind of group movie night and talk about it after. The kids in the film were great actors, and the two adult characters who were their heroes at times gave me hope in the world when watching. As I'm typing this, I actually do want to recommend it haha. And definitely want to see more Mongolian cinema.

It was 6 of us watching and I thought it was cool how no one pulled out their phone during the movie, at least as far as I could tell. Besides that we had Hainan chicken rice ordered an Uber Eats and my colleague hosting brought tea from Mongolia which was bomb AF.

¿Cómo dejar Gmail?

2026-04-13T15:01:00+00:00

Preocuparse por la privacidad y los datos personales en internet es un agujero negro del que resulta complicado salir. Cuando empiezas a leer y a buscar alternativas, a considerar otras posibilidades... entras en una madriguera de conejo que te absorbe.

Ya salí de Google Drive

Hace aprox. tres años compré un NAS de la marca Synology. Estoy MUY contento con él. Tengo 4TB de almacenamiento en mi casa, mi propia "nube" y un servicio de fotos que funciona perfectamente: hace copias de seguridad del teléfono, organiza las fotos por fechas, puedes crear álbumes y compartir esas fotos con quien quieras. Aparte de eso, sincroniza datos y documentos con los diferentes ordenadores que tengo. Fue una compra excelente.

Con mi propio NAS, me quité de Google Fotos y Google Drive. Aunque todavía uso Google Docs, porque es una herramienta omnipresente en la universidad, y facilita el trabajo colaborativo entre investigadores. Pero ya no subo nada personal a Google Drive, y eso es lo importante.

Ahora quiero salir de Gmail

Ahora llevo tiempo considerando una solución para el correo electrónico y el calendario. Como ya sabéis, Google analiza todos tus correos, y también tu agenda... Mis datos personales están ahí: visitas médicas, resultados de analíticas de sangre, informes privados, correos personales con mi pareja. Todo en manos de Donald Trump.

Me preocupa la soberanía digital europea y la protección de mis datos personales. Ahora mismo todo está en servidores de Estados Unidos, que es un país que no me despierta ninguna confianza, y en manos de una gran compañía como Google, que vete tú a saber cómo estará usando esta información. Aparte de todo esto, creo que es necesario dar pasos para apoyar empresas de nuestro entorno que apuestan por servicios de proximidad.

Para poner remedio al asunto, desde hace algún tiempo tengo una cuenta de Proton, a la que no he logrado darle uso durante el último año. También estoy viendo cómo funciona Tuta, pero no me convence. Estoy dispuesto a pagar por el servicio. Pero mi principal problema es que mi cuenta de correo de @gmail es la referencia para muchas personas que me mandan correos. No sé cómo lograré que la gente me mande emails a otra dirección de correo (un dominio propio).

He pensado en redirigir todos los emails de @gmail a Proton/Tuta, y enviar respuestas automáticas a todo el mundo diciendo que "estoy migrando" hacia un servicio de correo privado. Pero es un fastidio.

Además, he leído por alguna parte que Google tiende a etiquetar los correos de Tuta o Proton como spam. Si es real, sería un auténtico abuso.

Supongo que dentro de unas semanas escribiré un nuevo post para explicar la decisión final. Mientras tanto, acepto sugerencias, ideas, consejos y testimonios de cualquiera de vosotros que haya transitado antes por este camino.

todo list

2026-04-13T14:59:00+00:00

i use todo list app, any kind, but it must have the reminder function — I need a reminder to remind me to check my list.

if you use a todo list, look at it now:

the completed tasks were your past;

your to-dos will be your future;

now you are updating your list.

what a life, right ?